Use your Facebook for GOOD…

27 06 2018

Warning this post (and all it’s comments) is potentially triggerering.

YES, I am doing it again. I am using Facebook to vent about what is private and personal and so should you. What better way to join those trying to change the way we deal with sexual abuse? Not doing so has devastating consequences.

These acts are not rare or hidden from others…how many have relatives that everyone whispers about keeping your children away from? What about confronting them to their face full on!

Sexual abuse is traumatizing, especially when it happens in childhood and can result in symptoms comparable to symptoms from war-related trauma. They can show in MRI’s the effect, it’s like a wilting back of the structures of the brain.

I can tell you from my own personal experience that it skews your ability to function and think normally. I can see the difference in my ability to think as my brain has healed. Many professionals think the disability it causes is permanent.

I keep wanting to believe that it isn’t true, that I HAVE Healed, only to find myself so severally triggered by any lack of understanding or support whenever it comes up that I have to wonder how truly HEALED I am.

I just published a post about letting abusers know they are wrong and they need to stop, and it got very little support. How horribly we resist preventing the victimization of human beings!!!

When I was sexually abused as a 9-year-old child, He was 16 and I was guilty. I was called a whore and people told their kids they couldn’t play with me anymore. It was the first time I felt how powerful ostracising a human being can be.

When I was raped at 16 and committed the crime of telling someone, it happened again, my supportive foster family said: “No one wants you around their kids and You can’t blame them Shannon”.

I walked away that evening and felt living in bushes and bathing in bathroom sinks was preferable to living with those people.

Speaking about sexual abuse makes people squirm in their seats and look away as if they are ashamed of me, that I would be so uncouth as to bring such a subject up.

When I was sexually harassed at work and EVERYONE around me witnessed it … I found a notice in my box at work stating Sexual harassment was ONLY if your boss did it, and when I was unable to function and return to work and applied for unemployment, no one knew what I was talking about and it was denied.

When I did have a boss that went out of his way to make me uncomfortable, people witnessed it and started whispering that I was trying to get him fired and took his side. I never asked that anyone be disciplined, only that we have a meeting and explain how devastating it can be and how easy it is to remedy.

Had anyone turned to him and said “that is not appropriate in the workplace” I would have felt supported and safe. Instead, I became almost totally incapacitated by it. WHY do we still have a problem with this idea when so much is known about the devastation it causes?

Keep talking. Don’t ever let them shame us into being quiet again! The damage it does is much too great to allow people to believe they are not just as guilty when they look the other way.



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