They say that Valium are very addicting

24 07 2012

and before the fog lifted upon waking the first thought is that I need one so today I decide it is time to stop.  No more “mothers little helpers”.   Instead I reach for the Hersey’s and take a long swig straight from the bottle.  Liquid happy, but very short lived.

The tired weighs down on me.  It becomes hard to function for long.  I am stirring pots of angry with people I come in contact with and these are just deeper and deeper messes that I will have to clean up later.  Sleep beacons and again and again throughout the day; I gratefully except.

I helped dye my nieces hair and in the process combed a few streaks through my own, then got on the computer.  I read and wrote for a few hours, slept for a bit till the words came and I had to return to the keyboard; it’s dryed on my hair.  I should wash it out.  The next time I wake up I will;  It’s easier to jump into the shower when I first awaken.

I fear checking my mail as I have waited and waited for someone to write and the longer its gone on the more demanding I have gotten.  Yea that works… NOT!   Think I will try another swig of Hersey’s and go back to bed now.

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3 responses

11 08 2012
Isabelle

Wow. Seriously, I don’t know how or when or if I will stop taking Klonopin. I don’t think it’s an addiction but that word is hard to define. I do know that it is something I turn to when I am in panic mode. That is typically everyday. I think Id have to replace it with something a bit stronger than chocolate syrup. You are a braver lady than I.

24 07 2012
Kelleri

Chocolate Syrup isn’t the answer! Exercise, and go get some endorphins. I love you.

24 07 2012
Velcro Not Strings

I was wondering who would bother to read my posts…had to be you love, had to be you. 😀

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